Finding an EMDR Therapist, Part 2

I heeded the wise words of you, my fellow bloggers, and went ahead and made an appointment with another EMDR therapist. I just really did not have a good gut feeling about the second one. I don’t think I could count on her to help me contain anything that would become overwhelming, should it become so.

I do have a good feeling about the one I saw today, so hopefully it actually works out. She is a bit more than I can afford right now, so I might have to do biweekly sessions instead of weekly, which sucks. But, I would rather biweekly with a solid therapist than weekly with a therapist in whom I don’t really have confidence.

So, if you’re curious what makes this one different (maybe you’re on your own search for a therapist) this is what stood out about the appointment today:

1) she was incredibly intuitive. She knew when I wasn’t telling her the whole story. But she also knew when to push it and when not to push.

2) it felt easy to talk to her and she didn’t have to use self-disclosure to help me feel comfortable talking to her.

3) there was a good balance of me talking and her talking. I genuinely felt like she was interested in knowing my story. I didn’t feel like she was judging. And whenever she would interject it was to reflect or educate.

4) she asked questions I didn’t expect but that did feel relevant. Like, I have never been asked about whether or not I can actually make connections with a therapist (has it ever happened before). But she asked and explained why she asked. It made a lot of sense.

5) she empathized when I expressed lingering apprehensions about things surrounding the whole C debacle.

6) she emphasized safety. She made it known that she would ask about the self-harm even though she knows talking about it makes me uncomfortable. But that she asks because her primary concern is keeping her clients safe. She does not seem like someone who would jump to hospitalization though, which is also good.

7) lastly, she already knows my group therapist, so it will be easier for them to collaborate.

The session with K, that’s what I will call her, actually went so well that I am afraid something will happen and she will decide she doesn’t want to work with me after all. Because I’m so used to things not going well these days. I’m jaded. Keep your fingers crossed that this ends up being as good as it seems it could be, please. 🤞

13 Thoughts

  1. I’m glad you listened to your gut and the words of others about the therapist. I don’t think I ever got around to commenting, but I did read your post and was as skeptical of her as you were. You definitely sound more confident about this one and you listed a lot of really great reasons that it seems she will be a good fit for you. I will think positive thoughts for you, but I hope you will think them for yourself too! You deserve the benefit of the doubt that good things will happen.

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    1. Aw, thank you. I’m holding onto some hope. I mean, after all, group continues to go really well and I was apprehensive about that at first, too. So that seems like proof that things can be good.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. As you might know if you live in the U.S., hospital stays are rarer than the once were and only to quickly stabilize a person medically. Therapists who have been around the block only resort to them when absolutely needed.

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      1. Sounds like you know the ropes, then, KD. I did not mean to invalidate your reality, only to provide information in case it was something you didn’t have. Glad you dodged the hospital stay.

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  3. This sounds really positive 💜 I’m so pleased. It’s great that you trusted your gut and searched again after the other day with the self-disclosing T. My T does EMDR but I haven’t done it with her, she thinks it would help, so I’ll be watching with interest as you start it. Take care x

    Liked by 1 person

  4. She sounds great! I can understand why it seems too good to be true after your past experience, but I think it’s a case of seeing how it goes. Perhaps you could tell her that you’re worried that she won’t want to work with you. x

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