Life is still happening

I feel like I've been doing an awful job of keeping up with my blog lately. A lot has happened in my life. K and I had our last session. So heartbreaking. I had my first session with J, since K left. It was decent, nothing to phone home about. I'm just hoping the connection [...]

Group update

Just a short post to update those who are following the Wednesday night S.S. saga. I received a message from J this morning in response to my request to talk to her but not to talk any further with L. She said she "respects how hard this transition is for [me] and others" and that [...]

Group Therapy: A Shit Show

This post serves no purpose other than to vent about the group therapy transition I experienced today. Lol so if you're not in for some quality crying via words, look away. Group tonight was a shit show. We had the new girl, L, for the first time. I emailed her beforehand to ask why she [...]

Almost 30

My birthday is in 2 days. I will be 30. I keep looking back on my 20s and wondering if maybe I've had my priorities wrong this whole time. I've accomplished a lot, technically, but what do those things even matter? I've been married. But I got divorced. I've loved and been loved. But all [...]

I Spoke too Soon

Well, I guess I jinxed group therapy. Our group therapist told us today that she would be passing the group off to another therapist. While I logically understand that she is doing this to spend more time with her family, emotionally it feels like being given up on by another person. I literally just said [...]

From ‘No’ to ‘Yes’

I'm not talking about consent here. When it comes to consent, no means no. Period. What I am talking about here is turning an internal no into a yes. Taking the no we say to experiences and emotions and turning that into a yes, saying yes to feeling and experiencing all the things we are [...]

Patience is Difficult on the Long Journeys

Have you ever beat yourself up for not being further along than you thought you should be? Or, maybe you did get there but then you took 2 steps backward? Maybe you lost 12 pounds but then you gained 5 back. Maybe you managed not to cut for 2 months but then you slipped up [...]

There is no “suddenly” about positive change

Change is bloody hard. Sometimes it feels downright impossible. This is especially true for positive, lasting change. I've been thinking a lot about this since quitting therapy with C. I keep asking myself, "did I bail for the right reasons?" Because I dedicated myself to the therapy process. I told myself I was going to [...]

Meandering Down the Path of Wonder

Do you ever wonder what your life would have been like if a certain thing never happened or you had never met a certain person or if you were somewhere else at a specific time? I think this is natural right? To wonder about how things could have been different. But, for some of us we [...]